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November 2001 Archives

November 1, 2001

Govardhana I'm still struggling to

Govardhana

I'm still struggling to write the journal. I was wondering if I should even continue—at least for this month. I can't fathom the difficulty. I've been focused on my vow with determination. I rose early, engaged in chanting and hearing about Krishna for pretty much the whole day. I also walked around Govardhana Hill but, still, little came. Nothing to write about.

Most of the receivers of the journal are working quite hard to meet their responsibilities. At times their worldly duties seem to overwhelm even spiritual life. For many, their solace, their hope, is to one day again return to visit Vrindaban or Mayapur—places where Krishna consciousness was so real for them.

Even when my father visited Sri Vrindaban in 1982 he noticed the predominance of Krishna in Vrindaban as compared to the West. He told me, while pinching his thumb and index finger together to indicate something very small, "In the West Hare Krishna is this big." Then, stretching his arms open wide, a classic pose to indicate something gigantic, he commented in contrast, "But here [in Vrindaban], it is this big!"

I will try to continue the journal this month to spark memories and remembrances of Krishna consciousness, which are vivid in the dhama—images that seem to inspire devotees in spiritual life, whether they have visited here or not.

November 2, 2001

Govardhana In Kartik, niyama-seva is

Govardhana

In Kartik, niyama-seva is recommended‹the practice of simple devotions at the same time, everyday. Regulation is bliss in Krishna consciousness. Reserving set times in one's day for particular Krishna consciousness practices enables one to attend exclusively to those devotions without distraction. From focused, concentrated worship, a taste for spiritual life arises. It's the only way to execute Krishna consciousness. It's the example set by Das Raghunatha; it's the Bhaktivinoda-marg and the Prabhupada path.

After breakfast I begin Govardhana-parikrama. It's still a little hot, but luckily I found a large straw hat that I received as a gift several years ago to shade me from the sun. It's a Vietnamese peasant look, which I think looks somewhat ridiculous with my sannyasa robes. Still, except for the brijabasi children who mock me by yelling, "Topi! Topi!"—brajabhasa for hat—the sadhus and pilgrims seem to be even more respectful for some reason, bowing gently at the waist, as the "Sombrero Sannyasi" parades by.

I'm setting a good pace, only two and half hours at most, for half a full Govardhana-parikrama. This year I've divided the 24 kilometer parikrama in two equal parts: One day I go around the 12 kilometer southern side by Govinda-kunda, the next day I walk the 12 kilometer northern side around Radha-kunda. The lungs are good, the joints are getting loose, and the stamina is excellent, but my bare feet are sore and burning, only to ache all day. It's November, but the late morning sun is still near 90 degrees. The sands are a little hot now, but the weather will cool day-by-day and the feet will toughen up quickly, I hope. Regardless, I try to focus on the name and tolerate the simple austerity.

Frankly, my life in the West had become a bit soft, so I look forward to a month of simple living, absorption in chanting, and the consequent tolerance of a few bodily inconveniences. It's the Goswami life. I hanker for it.

November 3, 2001

Govardhana Each year I try

Govardhana

Each year I try to perform Kartik-vrata with a firm objective in mind suitable to my level of Krishna conscious practice and devotion. Constant travel in the West makes it too easy to become unregulated, which is not good for spiritual practice. For Kartik, I want to etch my devotional practices in stone—fixed and determined—so no matter how often during the year my venue of devotional practice changes, my practices remain regular. At the same time, I also want to significantly increase my spontaneous devotion, the practice of devotional service as a sweet feeling of love, not simply an obligation.

Pure love is the one activity that is not done to attain some fruit. It is done for itself. If we love to achieve something other than greater love, our love is not pure. Bhakti (love) is thus not a result oriented pursuit, but a causeless "be here and now" action focused on the moment. We thus chant, not just to finish or to complete a vow or obligation, but to please Krishna out of love for Him. I perform Kartik-vrata to increase my bhakti, to be satisfied in service to Krishna, to rid myself of the fruitive consciousness that relegates the practices of devotional service to a task.

The sweetest part of the day: mangala-arati at Govardhana. I haven't practiced much Krishna consciousness in a temple setting for years. The quaint and intimate gathering during brahma-muhurta (the hour before sunrise) infects one with a simple devotion. I forgot how uplifting and auspicious the prayers to the spiritual master (gurvastakam) can be when sung properly, at the right time, and in the right association.

November 4, 2001

Govardhana Downloading e-mail in India,

Govardhana

Downloading e-mail in India, especially in a small town like Govardhana, can be time consuming. I just don't have time for it during Kartik. Even the mode of the whole operation would impair my life here. Luckily, an old colleague has offered to do it for me weekly in Vrindaban. So it's off to Vrinbaban to send off the journal and quickly check my mail.

At 7 AM I leave for Vrindaban on a tempo, an archaic Indian put-put open taxi, pouring soot emissions into the cab—an antique of sorts imported from Germany in 1937, now built in India, but without a single change in design in 64 years! The advantage? If you like the native flavor, it's the mode of travel by the locals, the village brijabasis, and it's cheap. Damn cheap. The 14 rupee fee (.25 US) suits my budget for my stay here if I am to make the weekly one-hour trip.

I hop off the tempo in front of the ISKCON Krishna-Balaram Mandir. Naturally, I meet many friends. It takes a half-hour just to walk forty feet into the building. Several visitors have been looking for me wanting to know if I will be doing any parikramas. I politely refuse, but I'm torn. A sadhu, as much as possible, is open and welcoming when a person approaches for spiritual help. I try to be that way and it also suits my nature. This month, however, is reserved for myself. If I give, give, give, and don't put anything in, what will be left to give? This is the month to get something to give, and I'm resolute in my purpose, although it pains me to see acquaintances somewhat lost here in Vrindaban.

By nature, I'm somewhat extroverted. I use the term not so much in the sense of frailty, but as a disposition. An extrovert is more energized by the external environment, by people, and less inclined to the lonely internal world of solitude, thoughts, and dreams. An introverted disposition is the opposite. Years of practicing Krishna consciousness, however, has tempered my disposition. My room on the roof of the Bhaktivedanta Ashram is cave-like. To enter its three-foot walls you have to pass through two thick doors, and when the windows are closed, it is silent and pitch black. I like the cave and rarely leave except for the lone daily march around Govardhana. I am happy in my world of japa, thoughts, and dreams—at least for the month.

The sweetest part of the day: Damodarastakam (the eight verses in glorification of Lord Damodara). Raghunananda is a simple village man from Orissa. He is also surprisingly a sangeet-acarya—a master of classical Vaishnava song. I don't have much of an ear for music, but I've never heard singing like Raghunananda in the evening at the small temple here. The beauty and richness of his voice and the subtle, wholly unpretentious devotional nuances of his singing enraptures our small gathering.

November 9, 2001

Govardhana In July I wrote

Govardhana

In July I wrote a series of journal entries on humility and asked the reader to send their realizations. They are still coming. Yesterday I received a powerful quote by Srila Bhakti Raksaka Sridhara Dev Goswami from Brahma Muhurta that seemed to succinctly sum up the discussion we had on humility:

"Humility means not to encroach on the rights of others. And also, it should not be such as to kill one's own self. It must be natural."

Woke up this morning with very swollen feet from yesterday's parikrama around Govardhana Hill. Years ago, while I was living in Vrindaban, I could do a full ovardhana-parikrama for several consecutive days without any problem. My feet were gradually cultured for the task by living in Vrindaban. This year I came directly from America to Govardhana, went out on parikrama, and continued going on parikrama for eight days so far without break. My feet are getting worse everyday.

I have changed my parikrama schedule because of the heat. I am leaving at 3:30 in the afternoon instead of mid-morning. By 3PM today, however, I was still not sure if I would be able to go. I contemplated just wearing shoes to make it easier, but as an old resident of Vraja, the offense of worshiping Krishna with shoes seemed more painful than the blisters on my feet. I don't want to give up. I made a vow, and unless I am absolutely physically unable to continue, I am determined to keep it.

Going around everyday is an austerity—even when I'm healthy. I want to make sure that I do not renounce the parikrama prematurely just to avoid that austerity. Many old—even physically disabled—devotees limp around Giriraja daily. What are my aches compared to theirs? They have ample excuse to stop, but they remain fixed in their vows. And so should I!

I ask Asit, the temple manager, what he thought. He is a Govardhana-basi, a resident here. He is respectful of me and says, "Okay, wear shoes. No problem." But in the same breath says, "Go. Giriraja will protect you. The feet will get better as you go" Asit is a real devotee, so what he says is not just words but realization. Hearing his faith in Giriraja almost makes me feel like an infidel to stay back.

As I sit in front of the ashram with Asit, Devaki Pran walks in. Devaki Pranis an ISKCON devotee from the Maharastra State in India. Still in his late thirties, he has somehow retired to Radha-kunda. He goes around Govardhana Hill twice daily, every day of the year, and three times on Ekadasis and festivals. Once he even went around four times, walking for nearly for 18 hours. I show him how badly bruised my feet are and ask his opinion on what I should do. He shakes his hand nonchalantly in the direction of the parikrama path indicating that I should without question go. "No problem," he says. "Just walk slowly. Giriraja will protect you."

The pain has substantially subsided since the morning and Giriraja looks inviting. I confidently decide to go. Besides, today I walk on the Govinda-kunda side where stretches of soft sand make the walk slightly easier. My cane also helps to propel me along. Giriraja is helping! I remain focused and determined and even pick up the pace. The pain gradually subsides. The walk remains austere, but tolerable. Two hours and forty minutes later I fall to the ground in front the ashram and thank Giriraja for a successful parikrama. I drag myself upstairs to soak my feet in hot water. The feet are sore, but the spirits are uplifted. It's the mercy of Giriraja and it's worth the price. No gain without pain.

November 10, 2001

Govardhana I really worked on

Govardhana

I really worked on my feet last night—soaking, scrubbing, massaging with oil. They feel slightly better, but they are still quite bad. Again I ponder whether or not I should go. I reason, "My feet were worse yesterday and I made it, so today I should certainly be true to my vow." Just a short ways into the parikrama I realize that my feet today are much more sensitive. My pace slows to a crawl. The Radha-kunda side of Govardhana has long sections of rocky, broken paved roads, and hard rugged dirt paths. Even when I am healthy these stretches are testing. Frequently I stop to sift painful small granules of sand from the long and deepening cracks opening in both feet.

It is not even a quarter of the way around and I sense defeat. Although I am determined to complete my vow, I realize the toll taken physically, there is no way I will be unable to walk tomorrow. Three and a half hours later I collapse in relief at the front gate. Asit, as he does every night, is waiting for me at the ashram door. He greets me affectionately and helps me upstairs to my room. I'm tired, but very spiritually enlivened. With my feet burning, but my spirits so high, it becomes so obvious that happiness and distress don't exactly parallel physical pleasure and pain. Actually, I'm feeling so enthused in service to Giriraja that I'm ready again for the long haul tomorrow.

November 11, 2001

Govardhana When I awaken this

Govardhana

When I awaken this morning, I can barely walk to the bathroom; the feet are that bad. I dress and shuffle slowly to the temple, but I cannot stand during mangal-arati. I have to be more careful about vows that require physical austerity, because the body has limits. I should have been more prepared. Still, I'm very disappointed. I've failed to maintain my vow.

There is some solace, however. I can still take shelter of my nama-vrata, and perhaps my afternoon chanting will be more attentive. It is difficult to hear while I'm concentrating on negotiating rough roads with sore feet.

Nama-vrata, a vow to significantly increase the number of rounds daily, sounds like a great austerity. Normally it would be, but not at Govardhana. Chanting here is much easier. Of course, the struggle is there and determination is required, but the dhama gives a strength and enthusiasm in Krishna consciousness that is difficult to imagine elsewhere. Even newcomers experience a substantial surge in their spiritual capabilities here, provided their approach is proper. And when one performs a little austerity here for the purpose of increasing one's devotional service, peacefulness and enthusiasm inevitably blossom—especially prayerfully circumambulating Giri-Govardhana and begging for the mercy for the holy name.

I am writing this journal entry by the window of my room, which looks out onto the beautiful Dan-ghati view of Govardhana—the place where Krishna enacted the tax pastime. My vision has significantly changed in only a week. Giriraja no longer looks distant. He is friendly and inviting, eager to fulfill the desires of his devotees, whatever they may be. It's better to ask for krishna-prema.

Bolo Giriraja Maharaja ki jaya!

Japa Realizations I
Harinama is a prayer, but what are we praying for? Our chanting should be thoughtful, not mindless. We should concentrate on hearing each syllable, but why? For us it is not a mechanical ritual adopted from our forefathers, but a dynamic process of realization that we have boldly embraced in this lifetime for enlightenment. Why we came is why we should chant—at the very least. If we are not cognizant of our prayers, has Krishna appeared on our tongue?

November 12, 2001

Govardhana Japa Realizations II The

Govardhana

Japa Realizations II
The holy name is non-different from Krishna, but can we create Krishna by our lips and tongue? It is not a mechanical construct. Rather, the holy name descends and takes the form of syllables and sounds to one who is eager,dependent, and humble—one who invokes at least a dim reflection of the holy name by approaching Him without offense. Perfection therefore requires mercy. Mercy requires humility. Chant and beg for Krishna to appear on our tongue for His descent in His own sweet will.

November 13, 2001

Govardhana I finish my afternoon

Govardhana

I finish my afternoon chanting by 6PM and stroll outside my room on the roof of the palace ashram. Govardhana Hill rises in front of the ashram and is always a welcoming sight. I hear a lecture coming from the Modi Bhavan, the large dharmasala (guest house for pilgrims) next door, who are hosting a local Vaishnava sadhu. I listen carefully:

"Krishna's beauty is ever expanding and manifests according to the love of His devotees. As the gopis have the greatest love for Krishna, He is most beautiful in their presence—especially in the presence of Srimati Radharani, the greatest of all gopis. When Srimati Radharani's love is at the stage of transcendental pique (maan), Krishna becomes desperate to pacify Her. He humbly approaches Radhika to beg Her forgiveness. He is sweating, His hands are folded, He bends slightly from the waist, and streams of tears are pouring from His eyes. His beauty is unlimitedly enhanced by His sweet humble mood. No other person but Sri Radhika can bring out in Sri Krishna such a sweet temper, and thus in the presence of no other person is His beauty so stunning."

I was struggling this evening to complete my chanting. After listening to the sadhu say a few words I thought, "This is the fruit of my chanting today krishna-katha."

Japa Realizations III
Taste in chanting requires some nice thoughts of Krishna so that His name is understood properly and can manifest naturally with all His glory.

November 14, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts IV A

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts IV
A symptom of honesty is uniformity between what one is and what one portrays. An honest devotee faces his actual standing in devotion. It is thus paramount to
the cultivation of bhakti as it nourishes humility, the foundation of bhakti. Better to not chant ones rounds and admit it, than to not chant ones rounds and pretend to be chanting. The candor will foster modesty, a disposition helpful to chanting. It will also make it easier to fix at least some standard by which to proceed. Real integrity is to meet ones vows, but pretending will certainly doom progress.

Moral: Don’t bluff. Be who you are and then go forward in devotional service with sincerity.

I'm doing a lot of chanting, but without parikrama it appears more difficult to sustain the intensity of one's focus. Parikrama naturally seems to maintain the force of one's devotional practices. I miss it a lot, but can't go yet. Still sore.

Occasionally in the evening, after my duties are finished, I catch a few minutes of the BBC news on my shortwave radio. Today I am sad to hear about another disaster in New York as a plane crashes in Queens. They interview the local residents. I appreciate one fireman's realistic response to the reporter when asked how he's personally handling such crisis after crisis:

"It's unfortunate, but we are getting expert at disaster."

The response is very matter of fact, and I see also a universal message. Material life is disaster after disaster and then we die—the ultimate disaster. We must become expert at disaster, ultimately dealing with inevitable death. We should all become expert at disaster by coming to the stage of pure chanting and thus transcending all dualities of the material world. Are we getting "expert at disaster"?

November 15, 2001

Govardhan - Govardhan Puja It’s

Govardhan - Govardhan Puja

It’s auspicious to celebrate a festival of Lord Krishna, or remember His pastime, on the day and in the place where it occurred. Such days and such places offer special opportunity to awaken devotion. Srila Bhaktivinoda Thakur describe this by a simple metaphor, "the days of Lord Hari give birth to devotion (bhakati janani madhava tithi). Everything in Krishna consciousness is personal. On special Vaisnava celebrations, the day, the place and the pastime thus all have potency to reciprocate our worship by opening the channel of mercy to the flow of bhakti. I am fortunate to be at Govardhan on the auspicious day of Sri Govardhan Puja.

Although I am glad to be here, I still opted to more or less continue my regular program of sadhana, rather than fully participate in the festivities. I don’t want to be distracted from my vow. However, as it is principle of devotional service to lavishly celebrate festivals of the Lord according to ones means, I build a little mountain of sweets for my Giriraj Maharaj with a variety of exotic sweets purchased at the famous Giriraj Misthan Bandhar (sweet shop) just down the road.

His Holiness Narayan Maharaj is now in Govardhan with his parikram party. Some of his disciples saw me on the road and told him I was here. One devotee therefore came to our ashram with a message from him inviting me to visit. Considering the tension between his mission and ISKCON I am never sure of the welcome there. By etiquette if a senior vaisnava calls one should go immediately, or at least as soon as possible. Tomorrow I go to Vrindaban, so I will visit him the day after tomorrow. I sense it will be a better day for meeting him as his party will be out on all day on parikram. The setting might be more personal.

November 16, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts V The

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts V
The root of prema (love of Godhead) is dainya (humility). What is the question of love without humbly serving and submitting oneself to ones lover? Even a powerful man who falls in love willingly submits, and serves, the desires of his beloved. True love invokes humility, and true humility invokes love, for it enables one to serve others.

By the Hare Krishna mahamantra we are glorifying God and begging for His service. Can a proud man put his heart in such words, and if one can’t chant with
sincere feeling what is the question of chanting with devotion and relish?

Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu thus instructs:

"One should chant the holy name of the Lord in a humble state of mind, thinking oneself lower than the straw in the street, more tolerant than a tree, devoid of all sense of false prestige and ready to offer all respects to others. In such a state of mind one can chant constantly."

Only the humble soul can put his heart into the incantation of Hare Krishna and give it real meaning beyond just syllables and sounds.

Moral: If we want an attraction for the holy name we must serve, pray and chant for dainya (true humility).

November 19, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts IV To

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts IV
To perceive something, we must use the intelligence. Don’t void oneself of intelligence when seeking the holy name. The holy name will not come by our intelligence, but when the holy name comes use your intelligence to understand Him. Think deeply upon each word and search for meaning. It is part of attentive chanting.

Japa Thoughts V
Srila Prabhupada taught clearly the value of chanting with feeling and a proper conception in his simple instruction, "One should chant the holy name as a lost child crying for his mother."

November 20, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts VI Prayer

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts VI
Prayer is the earnest entreaty of the heart for purity. It is the essence of spiritual life and the essence of chanting Hare Krishna. Effective devotional service, effective chanting, chanting that absorbs the mind, must be done with feeling. Otherwise it is mechanical and tasteless. I pray to the holy name and by the holy name. I pray to Guru, I pray to God, the acaryas and the vaisnavas, past and present. I pray to the Deities, the Dham, the holy places and Lord’s eternal associates. I pray for myself, to understand myself, and I also pray for others. I pray for strength and I pray for humility, by notable prayers and my own words too. I seek mercy in all the Lord’s manifestations of grace. Such chanting absorbs the mind.

November 21, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts VII My

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts VII
My japa prayer is for visrambha guroh seva, worship of the guru with deep intimate attachment, not just obligation, but attachment that impels selfless and
loving service to his inner wishes and mission. That attachment is transferred to Krishna and qualifies us for His company. Can one enter Vrindaban without intimate attachment, and if it is lacking for His devotee will it manifest for God?.

I wish Srila Prabhupada were still here. His manifest form and visible loving reciprocation would certainly propel my heart further in His loving service. I search in the holy name and search in his mission for visrambha guroh seva. It’s the foundation of spiritual life, what Srila Prabhupada exemplified, what Srila Prabhupada taught, His main bhajan siksa (instructions for spiritual practice), but it is not sentimental or cheap. It takes sincerity of purpose and the mercy of the holy name.

November 22, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts VIII If

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts VIII
If we meditate on the form of Krishna in Vrindaban, a simple villager, how will we avoid envy and scorn, unless we know that He is not a simple cowherd, but God, or we have an intimate relationship with Him. And if we see Him as God, then are we meditating on Krishna in Vrindaban? Pray for sambandha jnana, an understanding of our relationship with Krishna, so that we may think of Him in Vrindaban, as just a cowherd, without misconception or malice. At least be cognizant that ultimately He is our friend, child or lover.

Japa Thoughts IX
Srila Prabhupada gave us Krishna, but couched in tattva, knowledge of His supreme position, so that we may respect and worship Krishna, even as a simple cowherd boy in Vraja, and gradually realize our intimate relationship with Him.

November 23, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts X Effective

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts X
Effective chanting must have relevance to ones life, be congruent with one’s heart. If our absorption is how avoid and counter the reverses of life, to become peaceful, moksa (liberation), how meaningful is our prayers for devotion, bhakti. If our mind is absorbed in economic development, increasing our resources and comforts, karma, then how meaningful is our prayers for devotion, bhakti. If bhakti has not yet captured our heart then take sadhu sanga, humbly serve the vaisnavas, and give the fruits of your work for the mission of Caitanya Mahaprabhu, and go on chanting, but pray for the mercy of the holy name. In time our heart and our prayers will be one.

November 24, 2001

Govardhan Japa Thoughts XI The

Govardhan

Japa Thoughts XI
The holy name has withdrawn His mercy. One can’t sit on his laurels. Constant striving and effort must continue, otherwise where is our bhakti, and without bhakti where is Krishna in the form of His Name? Some taste yesterday, some laxity today, Go forward. Give up the anchor of petty attachment. Never! Then never will Krishna appear.

November 25, 2001

Govardhan My practices here are

Govardhan

My practices here are finally becoming fixed. I am leaving the late morning open if devotees want to visit Govardhan and bless me with their association so that I may render some service to the Vaisnavas and chant in their company. Karnamrita and Archana Siddhi came last Sunday. Madhava is here today.

Madhava and myself went to rasa sthali at punchari, sight of Krishna’s spring rasa-lila. I have gone to this secluded, spiritual enriched, ancient forest many times and sat in the shade by the side of Govardhan next to a small white fortress like ashram. The door of that ashram just sits twenty feet to my left, and
although I have been here dozen of times I have never ventured in. Somehow today I am inspired. I pass the simple gateway and enter a simple but stunning courtyard temple of Sri Nathji, Lord Krishna lifting Govardhan Hill.

By the altar a few pilgrims are pouring their hearts out with devotion in simple song. I crowd closer to the altar. How clean and beautifully kept! The young, brahmana pujari gaits across the sanctum with grace and devotion. He finishes the arati, cleans the altar, and then greets his guru outside, bowing his head to his feet. His teacher is rustic, but regal, even with his light blue Praphupada hat with embroided multi-colored flowers. Guruji is renounced, living in the middle of this lonely forest, and accepts whatever Krishna gives him, even a funky hat. We have entered the spiritual world, a neat little enclave enriched with devotion. That’s how we feel among the six devotional pilgrims, the saintly pujari, and his stately forest guru.

I fold my hands and bow slightly to offer respect to all the vaisnavas. The guru sees me and says with faith and force, in a raspy deep Indian sadhu’s voice, "CARANAMRIT!" The disciple pours the caranamrita in small clay cups and gives each pilgrim a cup and a small Deity sweet. It’s like taking prasadam for the first time—an intoxicating, delectable, unprecedented taste!

Madhava, a great cook, famous for his gulabjammons, his eyes rolling in delight comments in earnestness, "I’ve never cooked a sweet like that!"

We alight back to the forest and then to the parikram marg and we are back to our taxi. I love such Vrindaban mysteries—opening unknown doors to the spiritual world by the key of causeless mercy!.

November 26, 2001

Govardhan Getting very attached to

Govardhan

Getting very attached to practicing spiritual life in Govardhan. I feel much at home here. Even thinking how to shift my base from Vrindaban to Govardhan.

The old fort, once made to protect the King of Khajaraho on his pilgrimage to Govardhan, now a fortress against the modes of material nature. It feels that way. Chanting, darshan of Govardhan, the mind becomes ones servant and satisfied to hear the holy name. I now understand why certain sadhus vowed never to leave the Dham, and the sages of yore were forbidden to cross the ocean—the modes thicken and become active and distract one from spiritual life. I must find a way to maintain this sadhana, even in the west, not just the numbers, quality.

I’m filled with contradictions: I don’t want to leave Govardhan, but I feel more enthused for preaching, leaving and sharing the Dham with others.

November 28, 2001

Govardhan Was informed that my

Govardhan

Was informed that my God-brother Sriman Tribhuvanatha Prabhu passed away three weeks ago and that a ceremony will be held today for him at the Krishna Balaram Mandir in Vrindaban. Although he was not a regular acquaintance, our exchanges were always pleasant. When I first came to Vrindaban in 1976, he was already here as a lead preacher. I have an eye for talent. I knew he was special.

Tribhuvanath was a young vibrant Irish devotee with a fighting spirit, a dashing hero type. He had intensity of purpose, but was never aggressive or exploitive. When one is compassionate energy becomes only an asset for helping others. Tribhuvanatha Prabhu dedicated himself selflessly to the mission of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu. He was non-envious and pleasant.

When I first saw Tribhuvanath, he was leading kirtan in the Krishna Balaram Mandir. He played the mrdanga so enthusiastically that by the end of the kirtan he would be stomping his left leg and feverishly banging the top of the drum with his right hand. At the kirtan’s crescendo, the clay drum gradually broke. He continued with fervor. It was gradually pulverized and it wasn’t the first drum broken by his innocent exuberance. It is hard to believe that one remembered as so exceptionally vibrant suffered an early death, a victim of cancer at just fifty years of age.

When a dedicated preacher leaves untimely, it can only be that the Lord has a more suitable body for them to serve the Lord’s mission, or they have gone directly to the spiritual world. Srila Prabhupada was so pleased with Sriman Tribhuvanatha for opening and running a successful temple in Edinborough before he was even twenty years of age! As an object of the spiritual pleasure, I would not be surprised if his untimely death brought him directly to Lord Krishna.

The next time I met Tribhuvanatha, he was on his yearly visits to Vrindaban. At the time, he was vigorously preaching and risking his life in the Middle East. I would sit in rapt attention as he would describe some of his exploits. He was fearless. He preached and distributed books in Lebanon during the war with Israel. One year, at the time of Guru Purnima, just before he was to leave for India to take sannyasa, he was unfortunately captured by the PLO and jailed as a suspected terrorist. He told me how painful it was to hear the jets flying overhead in the direction of India imagining they were heading to Mayapur.

Once he told how the car in front of him exploded. Like James Bond, he swung the door open from his taxi and jumped out to save his life before his car plunged into the fire.

He described to me how he distributed the first Arabic Gita in Beirut. The books were so big that practically one could only carry one at a time. When he ran into an office building to sell one, it looked like as if he was carrying a bomb. He had pleaded with his god-brother, Ravanari, the translator and publisher, to produce something more practical. Ravanari, however, was very stubborn. He was a former PLO lieutenant of Yasser Arafat, whose professed goal now was to march on Mecca and install Sri Sri Gaura Nitai. Sometimes Srila Prabhupadas’s books have been described as bombs, but perhaps only Tribhuvatha realized the importance, carrying and distributing the huge Arabic Gita, in a Muslim country, and during a war! Some men are just born heroes.

My association with Sriman Tribhuvanatha was occasional and brief, but left a strong impression. There is a saying that one can test the rice by tasting one grain. Looking back on those meetings, he was consistently enthusiastic, pride-less and good-hearted—a vaisnava fixed on the lotus feet of his spiritual master and fully dedicated to his mission. I can only assume, and it has been confirmed by others, he led his whole life that way. How wonderful to not only live dedicated to noble ideals, but to exemplify them as well.

From Sriman Tribhuvanath Prabhu we learn how to live a simple life with full dedication to the spiritual master without offense to others.

November 29, 2001

Govardhan Bhurijan Prabhu just arrived

Govardhan

Bhurijan Prabhu just arrived in Vrindaban. We talked for some time. He invited me over to his place to see his new Deity. I was surprised to see on the corner of the altar of his exquisite Sri Sri Radha Giridhari (govardhan silas) his new deity, three small wooden carved monkeys, one covering with his two hands his eyes, the next his mouth and the third his ears, the famous hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil icons. For a moment I was puzzled. I then caught on to import:

Bhurijan was an experienced resident of ISKCON Vrindaban, having lived here for over fifteen years. He realized, unfortunately, how any large gathering in Kali Yuga, even holy places, tend to become bastions of mundane topics, especially politics. To advance in bhakti, one has to be determined to avoid that. His new unorthodox deity thus served as a reminder to protect one from the main impediments to pure bhakti while living in the Dham. I did notice how he would expertly and politely gear any discussions away from even a scent of politics, or criticism, to meaningful discussions. Hear no evil, speak no evil, see no evil—a helpful reminder while being in the Dham.

November 30, 2001

Govardhan End of Karttik Karttik

Govardhan

End of Karttik
Karttik ends. The fruit of my vrata: Govardhan pours mercy in the form of sadhu sanga. His Holiness Radhanatha Swami, His Grace Bhurijan Prabhu, and His Grace Partha Sarathi Prabhu come to the ashram for the day. His Holiness Sacinandana Swami and His Holiness Niranjana Swami will arrive in a few days.

Partha Sarathi opines that we have so much to look forward in the Hare Krishna Movement in terms of sadhu sanga. From his own experience, he sees how deep the spiritual exchanges among certain devotees as they mature. He envisions how even more wonderful the exchanges will become in the future.

As individual practitioners of spiritual life, our path, personality and spiritual attributes develop uniquely as we become purified. I observed the extraordinary attributes of my god brothers:

Partha Sarathi has a deep attraction for worship and meditation and can happily sit alone all day chanting, reading and thinking deeply about Krishna’s pastimes.

Bhurijan Prabhu is exceptionally thoughtful and steeped in Bhagavat philosophy. He thus views the world through the eyes of the sastra, searching in each life circumstance for the unique opportunity to please Krishna.

Radhanatha Swami has a wonderful capacity to serve and love the devotees. Generally one is conditioned by duality. Ones affection for others is thus tempered by conceptions like friend and enemy, high class and low class, and senior and junior. I observed Maharaja carefully in his short stay. He makes no distinction in his love for the Vaisnavas, offering his warmth to all regardless of status.

About November 2001

This page contains all entries posted to Waves of Devotion | Journals in November 2001. They are listed from oldest to newest.

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